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The X-Rated Bible An Irreverent Survey of Sex in the Scriptures (Paperback)

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The X-Rated Bible Akerley, Ben Edward 1 of 1
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Product Details:

Format: Paperback
ISBN-10: 0922915555
ISBN-13: 9780922915552
Sku: 30464181
Publish Date: 4/30/2007
Dimensions:  (in Inches) 9.25H x 6L x 0.75T
Pages:  245
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Through historical research and "adults only" biblical excerpt, this controversial publication reveals the Good Book's seamier side. 12 illustrations.
From the Publisher:
Through historical research and "adults only" biblical excerpt, this controversial publication reveals the Good Book's seamier side. 12 illustrations.

"Everything you wanted to know about the holiness-horniness nexus, but they wouldn't tell you."—George Carlin

Found in nearly every home, within the reach of underage children, is a book plump with scenes normally confined to sin-bins marked “Adults Only.” We’re talking about the Holy Bible, a book filled with incest, rape, adultery, prostitution, drugs, bestiality, castration—all the nasty stuff!

Table of Contents

Contents

Introduction........................................................XI
Preface.............................................................XX
Prologue.........................................................XXIII
Part One  Incest: Implied, Single, Double and Multiple
    1. In the Beginning Was Incest...................................1
    2. Amnon Rapes His Sister Tamar..................................3
    3. Lot Knocks Up Both His Daughters..............................7
    4. Absalom's Defiant Act of Multiple Incest.....................10
Part Two  Sexual Pollution
    5. Onan's Fatal Orgasm..........................................13
    6. Wearing the Rag..............................................17
    7. Doing the Nasty..............................................21
    8. Wet Dreams and Wanking (Spanking the Monkey).................22
    9. The Clap and Other STDs......................................24
    10. Eve's Curse Fulfilled.......................................26
Part Three  Homosexuality
    11. Lot Thwarts a Gay Mob Assault in Sodom......................32
    12. David's Questionable Love Affair with Jonathan..............36
    13. The Love That Dares Not Speak Its Name......................39
Part Four  Rape: Solo and Group
    14. Reuben Rapes His Father's Mistress..........................45
    15. Shechem, the Rapist, Loses His Foreskin and His Life........46
    16. The All Night Gang Bang.....................................50
Part Five  Adultery: Attempted, Real and Forgiven
    17. Potiphar's Wife Hits on Teen Hunk Joseph....................56
    18. King David Commits Both Adultery and Murder.................58
    19. Cast the First Stone........................................64
Part Six  Indecent Exposure, Group Sex and Exhibitionism
    20. Noah Gets Drunk and Exposes Himself.........................68
    2l. The Israelites Revel in a Pagan Orgy........................70
    22. King David Flashes His-Royal Penis..........................74
Part Seven  Nudity and Striptease
    23. Prophesying in the Nude.....................................79
    24. Salome Strips for King Herod................................80
Part Eight  Prostitution (Secular and Sacred) and Phallic Worship
    25. Judah Patronizes a Disguised Hooker.........................83
    26. Rahab, the Favored Madam of Jericho.........................88
    27. Jehovah Commands Hosea to Marry a Whore.....................93
    28. Christ Converses with Two Women of Ill Repute...............95
    29. Eli's Horny Sons...........................................100
    30. Hung Like a Jackass........................................103
Part Nine  Abortion, Pregnancy by Proxy, Sex Drugs and Husband-Swapping
    31. Jehovah's Penalty for Inducing an Abortion.................113
    32. Hagar, the Baby Maker......................................114
    33. Jacob's Fertility Contest..................................118
Part Ten  Circumcision of the Living and the Dead
    34. Jehovah's Foreskin Covenant................................123
    35. Moses and the Flying Foreskin..............................132
    36. David Circumcises Two Hundred Philistine Corpses...........134
Part Eleven  The Lowly Status of Women
    37. Bizarre Tests for Adultery and for Virginity...............138
    38. Jephthah Offers His Daughter to Jehovah as a Human
    Sacrifice......................................................143
    39. The Female Hand That Fondles Shall Be Cut Off..............145
    40. Two Major Wife-Kidnapping Expeditions......................147
    4l. Virgins as Spoils of War...................................150
    42. Woman Was Made for Man.....................................154
Part Twelve  Catology, Bestiality and Castration
    43. Jehovah's Anal Fetish......................................161
    44. Forbidden Intimacies with Animals..........................169
    45. Self-Castration, the Supreme Sexual Sacrifice..............170
Part Thirteen  Illegitimacy, Celibacy and Virgin Birth
    46. Pity the Poor Bastard......................................175
    47. An X-Rated King Solomon for Kids...........................176
    48. Paul, the Compulsive Celibate..............................177
    49. The Immaculate Deception...................................184
Part Fourteen  Sexual Betrayal
    50. A Honeymoon with the Wrong Bride...........................190
    51. Abraham and Isaac, Two Double-Dealing Pimps................193
    52. Foxy Delilah Double-Crosses Superstud Samson...............197
    53. King Ahasuerus Ditches Queen Vashti for Esther.............203
Part Fifteen  Sexual Potency and Rejuvenation
    54. Gideon Sires Seventy-One Sons..............................207
    55. Solomons Thousand and One Women............................207
    56. King David's Revival with Female Body Friction.............208
Part Sixteen  In Praise of Love
    57. Ruth Propositions Boaz and Shacks Up Overnight in a
    Barn...........................................................212
    58. Solomon's Steamy Song of Love..............................215
Part Seventeen  Devil Sex and Witchcraft
    59. Cohabitation with Devils...................................220
    60. Witches, Wizards and Familiar Spirits......................221
Epilogue...........................................................223
Afterword..........................................................224
Biblical References................................................226
Index..............................................................230

Product Attributes
Product attributeBook Format:   Paperback
Product attributeNumber of Pages:   0245
Product attributePublisher:   Feral House
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